The Like Trap: Are We Addicted to Approval?

Last Sunday, I doom-scrolled Instagram for an hour—double-tapping reels of some guy flexing his new car, a college friend’s “humble” vacation brag, and a random influencer’s “morning routine” that’s basically a skincare ad. By the end, I felt like trash. My phone said I had 12 likes on my latest post—a work update I’d actually cared about—and somehow, that stung more than it should’ve. Ever been there? We’re all stuck in this social media trap, chasing likes like they’re gold coins, while our real growth—skills, peace, actual wins—slips through the cracks.

In India, it’s a whole different beast. Log onto X, and it’s a battlefield of opinions—everyone’s a guru, screaming for retweets. Instagram? A highlight reel of “perfect” lives—IT folks posing with laptops in cafes, freshers flaunting their first paychecks. My cousin Nisha, 23, spent weeks perfecting a reel about her “side hustle”—it got 500 likes, but she hasn’t touched that hustle since. Why? “Bhai, validation mil gaya, ab thodi si chhutti,” she laughed. But behind that laugh, I saw it: likes hooked her, not the work.

Here’s the trap: social media trains us to crave applause. Post a pic of your new desk setup—bam, 50 likes, dopamine hit. Share a half-baked thought on LinkedIn—20 claps, you’re a genius. But last month, I interviewed a startup founder, Sameer, who barely posts. He’s too busy building—his app’s got 10K users now. “Likes don’t pay my team,” he said, sipping chai. Meanwhile, I know folks with 5K followers who haven’t shipped a project in years. The math doesn’t add up—likes aren’t growth.

It’s worse in 2025 India, where every notification feels like a report card. My friend Vikram stopped painting—his passion—because his art posts got 10 likes while his gym selfies hit 100. “Logon ko yeh pasand hai,” he shrugged. But who’s “log”? Strangers who’ll scroll past by lunch? I fell for it too—tweaking posts for algorithms, refreshing for comments, until I realized I was growing a profile, not a life.

The real kicker? Time. Scroll X for 30 minutes, and you’ve lost focus for the day. Craft a “viral” reel, and that’s hours not spent learning, creating, or just chilling with family. I tested it—cut my screen time to an hour a day last week. Result? I read half a book, sketched a logo idea, and slept without a buzzing brain. No likes for that, but it felt real. Sameer’s thriving because he’s off the hamster wheel—building, not begging for clout.

So, let’s flip it. Use social media, sure—but as a tool, not a trap. Share what matters—your work, your wins—without obsessing over the numbers. I posted a raw thought on X yesterday: “Focus beats followers.” Got 3 likes. Cool. But it sparked a DM from a guy wanting to collab. That’s growth—quiet, messy, real. Nisha’s back at her hustle too, posting less, doing more.

What’s your trap? Are likes stealing your time, your drive? Next time you refresh for validation, pause. Close the app. Do something—anything—that doesn’t need a double-tap to matter. Because in 2025, real growth isn’t trending—it’s happening off-screen.